How lawyers can increase emotional intelligence through gratitude
Stacy Parmer is director of the Missouri Lawyers' Assistance Program.
The legal profession is a helping profession with demanding and emotionally complex situations that can over time lead to high levels of stress, depression, anxiety, and burnout, hindering lawyers’ emotional intelligence and making it difficult for them to practice law and serve clients.1
Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions in ourselves and others, which then guides our thinking and behavior. EI is a skill set that consists of self-awareness, self-regulation, social skills, empathy, and intrinsic motivation. Emotional quotient is a measure of that intelligence and can predict how well we traverse social complexities, make decisions, and cope with stress.2
Lawyers require a high level of EI to confidentially solve problems and interact with clients, judges, and opposing counsel. Having more EI can lead to lower levels of stress, increase rates of positive emotional states, and better client representation. On the flip side, depression, stress, anxiety, and burnout can lead to decreased EI, which may compromise decision-making abilities and lead to ethical lapses.
It’s essential for lawyers to prioritize well-being to maintain or even increase3 their EI to ensure they are making sound ethical decisions in their legal practices and during interactions with colleagues and clients.
One way lawyers can help increase their EI, and improve their mental health, is by practicing gratitude. Gratitude helps build positive relationships, increase empathy, develop a heightened awareness of your emotions, and reflect on the feelings and emotions of yourself and others.4
| Emotional intelligence pillars | Gratitude |
| Self-awareness | Increase awareness of positive emotions, values, and strengths |
| Self-regulation | Reframe default thinking to positive reflections (what's going well, what positive emotions you're experiencing, etc.) |
| Social skill | Increase prosocial behaviors; decrease anti-social behaviors |
| Empathy | Foster empathy for others |
| Self-motivation | Become aware of your purpose in life; improve self care; and increase use of personal/professional strengths |
Science shows that gratitude isn’t just a feel-good concept; it's backed by research. When we practice gratitude, our brain releases dopamine and serotonin, two neurotransmitters that are responsible for our emotions.5 Regularly practicing gratitude can have lasting effects and improve psychological conditions like stress, anxiety, and depression by turning your thoughts toward good things.6
Begin changing your brain by regularly reflecting on and practicing gratitude at work. For example, each day, write three things you are grateful for in your career or at your firm. Make it a point to express gratitude to one fellow lawyer, judge, or client each day.
In expressing your gratitude towards others, you can increase your EI and may find a renewed sense of purpose, helping lead to more positive relationships with clients and other lawyers.
Endnotes
1 Bloomberg Law Attorney Workload and Hours Survey, Bloomberg Law (2024), pro.bloomberglaw.com/insights/business-of-law/attorney-workload-and-hours-survey. According to the survey of legal professionals,
- 57% stated they might leave their jobs for reduced work stress.
- 54% stated they might leave for a better work/life balance.
- 55% experienced anxiety.
- 37% reported worsened mood.
- 20% experienced depression.
- 14% noted increased alcohol usage.
2 Dana Ackley, Emotional intelligence: A practical review of models, measures, and applications, 68 Consulting Psychology Journal: Practice and Research 269 (2016), https://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/features/cpb-cpb0000070.pdf.
3 Unlike Intelligence Quotient (IQ), which typically remains stable from adolescence, EQ is not fixed and can continue to improve with age and experience.
4 Linda Roszak Burton, Emotional Intelligence and Gratitude, University of Pennsylvania Wharton Healthcare Alumni Association (March 2, 2026), whartonhealthcare.org/emotional_intelligence_and_gratitude.
5 Roland Zahn, et al, The Neural Basis of Human Social Values: Evidence from Functional MRI, 19 Cereb Cortex 276 (2008), https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2733324/#bib31.
6 Id.